Prophets of Doom

Why have the prophets of doom adopted global warming as their current battle cry? When I was a child, it was nuclear power. We were all going to die because we were using nuclear reactors. Then in my teens it was AIDS. The population was doomed to dwindle away to nothing because AIDS was going to rip through the heterosexual population like a plague of locusts. Then there was the hole in the ozone layer. We were all going to die of skin cancer in the 90s. Now, as I approach my fortieth birthday it's global warming.

What really gets me about all these issues is that the storms are always whipped up by the uninformed. Yet somehow they always seem to take hold. Currently it's Al Gore leading the crusade against global warming. And I'm reading in the press this morning that Sir Nicholas Stern, economist, yes ECONOMIST, is predicting a 20% shrinkage in the global economy, 100 million people displaced by floods, and 40% of species becoming extinct. This man is not qualified to preach about scientific matters! What he knows about environmental science could be written on a gnat's arse with a fat crayon! And Al Gore is a washed up politician trying to kick start his career. Why do these people have any credibility? If Stern can show me where he gets his figures from, I'll start listening to him. Until then, I just wish he'd shut up.

Today started pretty badly. The train was late. I just missed the bus from the station to the office, and when I did arrive, the coffee machine was out of beans. However, the coffee machine bean hopper has now been replenished by the coffee gnome, and things are looking up. I was also given a permanent office pass this morning, which makes me think I'm probably not going to get fired this week. I haven't actually tried to open a door with it yet come to think of it.

The weekend was nothing special. We bought a huge pumpkin and made a lantern on Saturday.This year we carved two faces; a happy one on the front and an angry one on the back. Dumpy really didn't know what to make of it. No one has yet knocked on the door begging for sweets, but halloween arrives tomorrow. I don't mind the little ones coming round. I think teenagers are too old for trick or treating.

We did a bit more driving practice on real, public roads yesterday and the dragon is gaining confidence. She actually drove home from the park without incident.

I got hold of a copy of the new Richard Dawkins book, The God Delusion, this weekend. I'm about two chapters in. I don't like Dawkins' writing style, but the man speaks soothe, and it is essential reading. I found out he is married to Lalla Ward. This will mean nothing to the majority of people, but Lalla Ward was an assistant of Dr Who, some 20 years ago. She married Tom Baker for a very short time. She met Dawkins at Dougals Adams' (Hitchhikers' Guide) 40th birthday party. Who'd have thougth it?

Submission

I've decided that I am going to submit a short story to Pseudopod. I don't write fiction and I have certainly never sold anything, but who knows, there could be some wild untapped vein of creativity in me that I just didn't know about. If they don't buy it, and I don't think there's much chance they will, I'll post it here and people can be as critical as they like about it. It's already written, but it needs some tweaking. It's just not dark enough. I'll keep you posted on that one.

Last night I was eavesdropping on two young women waiting for the same bus as me. One of them was claiming that she had no time for love and relationships. She claimed that love was selfish. They other found her point of view difficult to understand. Their conversation turned to a particular female friend who evidently told them that her boyfriend had told her that he would leave her if she started smoking. They were discussing whether making that kind of demand on someone is selfish. It's interesting isn't it. I'd say that the relationship probably doesn't fall into most people's definition of love. I'm thinking about it anyway.

I mentioned a few days ago about a man who had been pooing on trains in the south of England. The police were looking for him. Well he's been caught at some bus station. I wanted to catch him, but it was not to be. But at least he's not taking a dump on trains anymore.

OK, this weekend I will be making pumpkin lanterns and lots of other groovy stuff.

Window Cleaners are Scum

On Monday I picked up a copy of Reach Magazine on the train. It's a complimentary mag published by First Great Western. It's not wonderful, but I noticed from the cover that there was a competition to win a portable digital radio inside and I was quite keen to have a look. So I did. I had to trawl through articles about hair gel and Johnny Depp's love life before eventually finding that, to enter the competition it is necessary to visit a website and send details.

So I made a note of the URL and entered the competition when I go to the office, except it didn't work. I got an error message. I tried a couple of times with no success before giving up. I thought it could be because I was behind a firewall. I tried again when I got home, but still it didn't work. So I thought I'd drop First Great Western a line and tell them their competition page was broken. And I got a reply the next morning. There was an apology for the problem and it was suggested that I call the support team. A premium rate phone number was included. They actually took the time to reply to my e-mail and asked me to call their support team when they could have simply forwarded my mail to the support team themselves. I was astounded. I wrote back a hugely sarcastic note. And the website works this morning.

Did I mention that I finally met the window cleaner? I've been looking out for him for weeks and he finally knocked on the door about ten days ago. He said I could have a year's subscription to his window cleaning service for £60. I told him that I wasn't keen on the idea because he could just take off with my money and not clean the windows. He told me he would be cleaning the windows on 16 Oct. So I gave him £60 and I haven't seen him since. I called him and left a message, scum bag. I haven't given up yet. More news as we get it.

Did anyone notice that the Prince of Wales is in the limelight because he's making squillions of pounds from his Duchy of Cornwall estate, and not seemingly paying the same rate of tax as everybody else? The Prince seems to think that we the people should be grateful for any tax that he does pay, because he's under no obligation to pay anything. I thought only the queen was exempt from tax, though even she does pay some. It's impossible to know how much profit the queen actually makes however, since she is not required to declare her share portfolio for reasons of national security. I know, I can't believe it either, I sound like a socialist. Here's the twist however; in a startling role reversal, the socialist chancellor, Gordon Brown, is supporting Charles. Why could this be? I don't suppose it could be because he wants Charles' support when he makes his bid for leadership of the labour party could it?

The royal family are also facing a legal case from a man who claims to be the illigitimate son of Princess Margaret. Funny how he waited till she was dead to speak out about this isn't it. I read his story in the paper this morning and it was a complete joke. He has no evidence at all.

Michael J Fox has made an emotional appeal for people to vote against Bush in the mid term elections. He has a strong reason for making this plea being a parkinsons sufferer and idiot boy Bush banning stem cell research. Rush Limbagh immediately rubbished Fox and said his parkinsons was exaggerated for the tv. Even if it was true that was a really scummy thing to say. Limbagh is someone I had some respect for, though he doesn't really make his point very well in my view. I think it takes a certain courage to stand up and display a condition like parkinsons for the whole world to see.

The Chair

Well Wesley Snipes is in all sorts of trouble. The US tax office wants to speak to him about some irregularities, but he's filming in Namibia. It seems that the US can't really touch him while he's there. That's a real conundrum isn't it; go back to the US and face prison, or spend the rest of eternity in Namibia? It's a close call, but I think I would chose Namibia. Personally I don't know whether he cheated the tax office but I think he should get the chair just for Blade.

The BBC today reports that there was a disturbance in Stroud last night at the Subway sandwhich shop. The police were called to deal with rowdy youths. And what do you think happened... The police got scared and locked themselves in the shop until things calmed down. I'm astounded, genuinely speechless, I mean honestly, I could understand if it was a Mafia armed siege situation, but we are talking about rowdy teenagers here. The really jaw dropping statement came from the Chief Superintendent of Gloucestershire, Dean Walker who said, "I would like to take this opportunity to praise the officers involved for dealing with the incident in a thoroughly professional manner." You couldn't make it up.

Damien Hirst has been accused of plagerism. His piece "Valium" apparently bears a most striking resemblance to "True Daisy", which appeared in a book some years before Hirst's work was created. Here's my take on this. I've seen the pictures and I'm quite sure Hirst's piece is a copy of the much earlier "True Daisy". He has added some colours, but in my view, he didn't design it. However, Andy Warhol didn't design Campbell's soup cans, Roy Lichtenstein lifted images from graphic novels, and if you really want to take this argument to it's logical conclusion, Constable's Haywain is a painting of a cart not designed by the artist. Where does one draw the line? I have some sympathy for Robert Dixon who was the creater of "True Daisy", but it was Damien Hirst that made it art. It was worth nothing until Hirst worked on it. Hirst earnt the money.

There was an article in the Times this morning about the Oracle at Delphi. A new theory sugests that all the women priests/prophets were high on dodgy gasses rising from the faults there. And I thought they could really see the future.

I didn't spot the train pooper today.

Train Defocator

We went to Cribbs Causway at Bristol this weekend. It's a large shopping Mall. That's not very interesting really is it. I guess you could say that we didn't have a hugely exciting weekend. I did like the Bear Factory shop at the Mall. You go there and chose a bear skin, a voice box, and some clothes. Then they stuff him for you. They even put a little heart inside before they sew him up. I was really quite taken by the idea. I'm going to chose one for Dumpy for Christmas.



There were billions of people shopping. I thought Sunday would be a quiet day. I don't understand why the Mall is allowed to open until 5pm on a Sunday there when supermarkets have to shut at 4. How come the "Keep Sunday Special", Nazis haven't managed to banjax that? Anyway, the car parks were full and the shops were heaving. There's something odd about Bristol. Well, there are lots of things odd about Bristol, but one struck me in particular. The teenagers seem quite normal, but the adults are all fat. I think there's something in the water that only affects people over 20 years old.

I also took the dragon out for some driving practice this weekend. I don't know whether I mentiond this before. The dragon already holds a driving licence. She passed her test in Taiwan when she was 18. However, Taiwan has the easiest driving test in the known world. They don't even take you out on the street. And she has hardly driven since the day she passed. Also, you have to pass your test in a manual (sick shift) car here, and she has very little experience. So, she's nervous. I took her to the Nationwide car park. I used to work for that dung heap of a company once and I knew it would be nearly empty on a Saturday. So we trundled round the place for about an hour. I was really scared that me teaching her to drive would result in huge rows and possible divorce, but actually things went well, and we even ventured onto the public road briefly. So, more news about that as the situation develops.

Heather Mills McCartney appears to have made a huge PR error in her attempts to paint her estranged husband in a bad light. Whether her husband abused her or not, she didn't seem to realise that McCartney is regarded by millions as something of a god, and as such is simply immune to bad press. It would appear that the more accusations Ms Mills McCartney makes against her ex, the more people turn on her. One of her accusations did ring true with me however, and that is the one about him being constantly stoned. He is well know for his belief that pot should be made legal, and if memory serves, he has at least one conviction for possession. I don't like either of them very much and I'm predicting that Paul is going to come out of this pretty unscathed, while his wife is going to pretty much wreck her public image and chance of grabbing the McCartney millions.

Madonna is in a slightly embarrssing position after reports this weekend seemed to suggest that the father of the child she has adopted didn't realise he would be gone forever. One wonders what he did think was going to happen. I suppose that when David comes of age he can actually make his own decision about whether he returns to his family in Malawi or not. And of course, he's not going to give away the comfort and wealth Madonna will bestow up on him.

And finally, I'm hot on the trail of the train defocator. I'm sure he's operating in my area because there was a carriage missing from one of my trains last week.

Predictions

The big news today is that I've put the dragon on the car insurance and we're going to go out for some practice at the weekend. She already holds a Taiwanese licence, but she hasn't driven for some years, so it will be an adventure. I'm sort of thinking that I should get someone else to take her out. You shouldn't really teach loved ones to drive should you. I should try a few times though. If things go pear shaped, we'll have to get some lessons.

OK, predictions, I've been thinking about predictions. This came about because two, yes two, of my past predictions came true this week. There isn't any damn water on the moon and Jane longhurst was not murdered by her boyfriend. So here is my list of current predictions. I may add to this, but I won't take anything away:

Bin Laden has been dead for years.
There is no life or water on Mars. It's a rock.
The ozone layer isn't getting bigger.
The planet isn't getting hotter.
Hydrogen is the future of internal combustion. Fuel cells are a joke.
Blue Ray DVD can't survive because it's too expesive.
The segway scooter company is going to go bust.

OK that'll do for now. I think I might make a predictions page and link to it everywhere. I could even turn this into a betting game or somehting.

The above was written Friday but never posted. Since then we have been driving and didn't fight. We did go on public roads very briefly, but it was mostly in a deserted car park. She needs practice and confidence, but she'll be fine.

Tomorrow we intend to go to Bristol. It's not very exciting, but who knows, something may happen.

I predict...

Dumpy has to go for his vaccinations today. He's had quite a few already, but they've changed the regime and he is now destined to have soem catch-up shots. It's meningitis today. The Dragon has to take him up to the surgery by herself because I am working. She doesn't have a British driving licence, so she has to walk. It's not far, but it's not nice if it's raining. We got her an international driving licence ast time we were in Taiwan and I've said we will go out in the car this weekend to practice. She'll need to pass a British test to drive here after the first year of residence as far as I can tell. She's scared, but it'll be an adventure.

I've mentioned here a few times about Jane Longhurst. She died during a rough sex session a couple of years ago. Her boyfriend was found guilty of murder and jailed. I always said it was an unsafe conviction. It was as much misadventure as anything else. I'm quite sure it was an accident. I was particularly disgusted with Longhurst's mother who tried very hard to paint a very negative picture of the guy and started a campaign to try and ban porn. It was ill thought out at best. Anyway, the guy has gone back to court an appeal and had the conviction overturned. A victory for common sense. Now that's two triumphs in two days. Yesterday my prediction about no water on the moon came to fruittion, and today my unsafe conviction was overturned. I wonder what tomorrow will bring.

A new invisibility cloak has been built by a US British team of scientist, or so the headline would have us believe. In fact, all that has happened is that a device has been built that can steer microwaves around itself and then shoot them out the other side as if there was no obstruction. It's the basis for a cloaking device, but it's a long way from perfect. It's not even working in the right spectrum. Exciting though isn't it.Click.

There is an article on the BBC website claiming that Al Qaeda has become more organised over the last five years, is operating a cell structure in UK, and that UK is now the number one target. I want to believe this just because I want to blame Tony Blair. Well I do believe Blair and his idiot friend George have made the world a more dangerous place with theie soldire games, but I can't say I believe Al Qaeda has anythign to do with it. I think Al Qaeda was just a bunch of crusty radicals that got lucky once. I'm almost certain bin Laden is dead, and I don't think we have any reason to believe any of the terrorist attacks since 9/11 have been truly Al Qada planned projects.

The BBC article makes lots of wild claims about how things are apparently operating now and how 7 July bombings were just the start, but it really doesn't give any facts, sources, or reasoning. I have come to the conclusion that muslim terrorism hasn't changed very much since 9/11. It's still tiny unconnected groups with common goals acting independently. The only real difference is that they have become more active, buoyed by the success of their fellows. Click.

I just had an idea. I'm going to write a list of predictions. Since I got two right this week already, I feel strong. Watch this space.

Tissue of lies

Oh there is nothing in the news today even remotely interesting. Except that everyone is calling David Blunkett's diary a tissue of lies. In fact I was most pleased to see that Lord John Stevens, former Met Police Chief, thick as pig shit, and someone I usually loath with a passion you wouldn't believe, said that David Blunkett was a "bully and a liar". He also said you should never speak to him alone because you would likely need a witness.

It's getting colder and I've been turning the central heating on in the mornings. My parents seem to have become immune to the cold in their old age. When we visited at the weekend, their house was much colder than ours and they haven't started using the heat yet. They do live half way up a mountain.

Paul McCartney appears to have been accused of physical abuse by his estranged wife. I find that difficult to believe somehow. The Madonna adoption case continues, and now questions are being asked about how the hell she managed to do it. I'm really in two minds about this one now.

Remember ages ago I told everyone I was very dubious about the announcement from NASA claiming there was water ice on the moon? They should have listened to me. It's now being suggested that all the radar evidence they collected is likely to point to rocky deposits and not ice after all. Told you. They need a few more skeptic in NASA. Click.

Cod stocks are all running out, and Iceland has started commercial whaling again.

Information Commissioner?

Today the History Matters website is asking people to write a diary of their day. The collection will be stored at the British library for future generations to look at. I thought I would do this, but I thought it might be more interesting to do one for the baby. He's not 7 months old yet, so I think he would need some help from his Daddy to type it all in. I'll have to get a report from his Mummy about what he did while I was working.

I read in the Times this morning, that Information Commissioner, Richard Thomas, has ruled that three government studies into id cards be made public. The treasury is contesting this. I don't actually know what the information commissioner does, but I am going to try and find out. What bothers me is the fact that the treasury has the nerve to try and keep these studies from the public. I'm guessing that these are cost studies since they are being blocked by the treasury. The question is, how can they justify keeping details of how they spend public money, from the public?

It occurred to me the other day that the cost of these cards is the first absolutely unavoidable tax. All other taxes are, at least in principal, optional. One doesn't have to work and pay income tax and national insurance. One doesn't have to live in a house and pay council tax. In theory VAT is only chargeable on non-essential items. No one has to have a tv, drive a car, or gamble, so those taxes can be avoided also. But the id cards are likely to cost £100, and each person is going to be billed for it individually. This is a tax merely on existance.

Abbey pointed out yesterday that Madonna is is atempting to adopt a boy from Malawi that is not an orphan. It does appear that the boy still has a father, though his mother is dead. His father did however give the boy up for adoption and is still happy for it to go ahead. I can only think this is because he considers, like me, that the child will have a better life in almost every way being brought up in the west. I don't pretend that the arrangement is perfect, adn I can't help thinking that Madonna has more than altruistic motives. It doesn't affect the out come however.

The best story in the news today is that of a British man fined £200 for putting paper in his metal and glass recycling box. The result - the gentleman no longer recycles for fear of another brush with the law. Quite right too. I'm going to stop recycling for a month in protest, You think I'm joking?

Caviar rationing

Tomorrow is 17 October. The History Matters website is inviting everyone to write a diary for the day. All the resulting blogs will be stored for future generations to see how we spent a mundane day. I think they should have made it a two day event so that it covered a Saturday or Sunday and a weekday. Weekends are very different from weekdays after all. I may upload my ramblings for that day anyway. I like the idea.

Madonna seems to be in all sorts of trouble over her attempts to adopt a child from Malawi. There would appear to be a legal battle now in progress that may prevent her from taking the child. Apparently she has returned to UK without the child while legal matters are settled. I'd have thought she might stay with him if she was doing this for emotional reasons. There's that cynic in me again.

I have to say, I think it's a publicity stunt. That's not to say that she can't or won't give this child a good life, or that he won't be loved. On the contrary, I'm quite sure he will have a much better life with Madonna than he would have had in Malawi. I can't really understand the objection to overseas adoption. I know that in China, girls get abandoned every day. If no one adopts them they spend years in orphanages. Seems to me a good home anywhere is preferable.

Of course, the question one really needs to ask is why people are going abroad to adopt rather than adopting at home. It couldn't be because the authorities are making it too damn difficult at home could it?

The UN has agreed to impose sanctions upon North Korea and even China has joined in, though they are still supplying oil and food. Luxury goods have been banned however, and this is being seen as a personal dig at the leader, who apparently likes nice things. I can't see that banning luxury goods will have much of an impact. I imagine Kim can get pretty much what he wants for himself, and even if he couldn't, I don't think caviar rationing is likely to tip the balance of power.

Shocking

There is a ridiculous article in the Times this morning which seems to have originated in New Scientist. I actually quite like New Scientist, though it's become the mouth piece of the Eco Warrior in recent years, which does hack me off a bit. I don't know whether the article in Today's Times is simply badly reported, or whether the original was also bilge, but it tries to produce a timeline of events that would occur if man was wiped from the face of the eearth in a single catastrophic event tomorrow, with all else left intact.

First on the timeline of events is light polution, which would end within 48 hours of humans vanishing. I think that's a fair statement, obvious, but fair. At 3 months nitrogen and sulphur oxides start to lesson in the atmosphere, OK. Within 10 years the methane in the atmosphere is apparently "gone". I'm no expert, but I do know that all rotting organic matter releases methane, so you are not really trying to tell me that methane just vanishes in 10 years are you? In 50 years GM crops vanish. I'd say that was unlikely. They might even prolifereate without man to stop them. Most buildings will be gone in 1,000 years. I can think of a lot of exeptions to that. There are plenty of structures already thousands of years old. Apparently nearly everything is gone in 50,000 years. I guess most things would be gone in 50,000 years. The article claims that some chemicles only disappear after 200,000 years and some nuclear waste will remain deadly for 2,000,000 years.

I can think of a few other things that would be left behind. The non reactive metals, especially jewellery will be around for millions of years, as will precious stones that have been cut. I think the precious stones will last pretty much for ever. Stone structures wear away over the millenia, but carved stone will last eons. Buried relics would last longer than those exposed to the atmosphere. The whole article is silly. We already have artifacts from prehistoric times which are millions of years old. I myself have some ants preserved in amber. What really gets me about this though is the fact that some academic clown is claiming kudos for this when any reasonably intelligent 13-year old could have come up with it. There is no specialist knowledge, no creative thought, no original ideas, it's all wallpaper.

Last night I missed the 18.03 train. The 18.12 was cancelled, and the 18.24 was late. By the time I got home it was almost time to go back to work again. We really do have the worst rail system in the whole wide world I think.

Tomorrow is Friday 13th - Woooooo. It's also Halloween at the end of the month and we are planning on making a pumpkin head again. I love doing that. And this year of course we have an excuse in the form of my son, so we'll look like good parents and not immature students or something. I was toying with the idea of using some other vetetable this year, but I think you have to go a long way to beat pumpkins. Also, pumpkin is another food our little boy has yet to experience, so we can slaughter two birds with the same rock here.

The BBC website seems to have been down all day - shocking!

Out of his hat

Today the news is full of comments from the Lord Chief Justice. Apparently he thinks that history will judge that five year prison sentences are barbaric, along with ducking stools, and public flogging. This word "Barbaric" is often thrown at us. Hunting with dogs is "barbaric". Boxing is a "barbaric" sport. Execution is "barbaric". I looked the word up to make sure that I knew exactly what it meant.

Merriam Webster told me:

Of, relating to, or characteristic of barbarians.

Possessing or characteristic of a cultural level more complex than primitive savagery but less sophisticated than advanced civilization.

Marked by a lack of restraint - wild. Having a bizarre, primitive, or unsophisticated quality.

This was close to what I thought, but I looked up "Barbarian", just to be sure...

Of or relating to a land, culture, or people alien and usually believed to be inferior to another land, culture, or people.

Lacking refinement, learning, or artistic or literary culture.

So, what do we have here? I think the key word is uncivilized, but these definitions also point towards uneducated, and a culture perceived to be inferior in some way.

I'm not going to start arguing semantics, I'm just facinated by the words here. This judge seems to think that sending people to prison is uncivilised. I can only assume that he made this statement becasue he would like to see society become more civilised. Yet, shorter prison sentences would inevitably mean that more "Barbarians" remain at liberty to perorm their barbarous deads. Doesn't that have the reverse effect?

The cynic in me wonders if it was a coincidence that these comments come just days after the Home Office was forced to admit that prisons were overcrowded. I think judges have to be seen to consider prison to be a means of rehabilitation. But it can be shown quite clearly that prisons do not work as a deterant. One only has to look at reoffender figures. The public think of prison as a means of punishment, or revenge in some cases. Which is why we think that longer sentences are better.

In my view punishment achieves little. I think of prison as a way to keep the scum off the street for a while. From my point of view, longer sentences also work better. But prisons are expensive, and neither the public or the government like paying for them. So there is an argument for reducing prisoner numbers. I don't have a problem myself with the ultimate in barbarism, execution. There is a valid argument against executing people of course, you can't be sure never to make a mistake. Executing someone by mistake would be a terrible thing, but you can't get away from the fact that the world would be a better place without the likes of Huntley, Hindley, West, West, Shipman, Sutcliff, Brady, and others. Two of those have committed suicide in prison anyway, and I think Brady died didn't he? Collectively they cost us millions.

Little bit of nothing

I'm not sure whether I approve of sanctions against North Korea. If one is to believe what one hears of Kim Jong Il, then he cares very little for the welfare of his people. In which case, sanctions will throw the people of North Korea even further into poverty and hardship, and Kim will not see it as a problem. In fact, the only thing that would be unacceptable to Kim would seemingly be a threat to his leadership, and it's difficult to see how his leadership could be challenged. The Chinese are getting excited. I wonder if they will send in the army.

Although I am quiet at work currently, somehow I didn't get time to write anything today other than the above paragraph. I could simply be in a mood for not writing.

I'll think of something cool to write tomorrow.

5.4 billion!!!!

So, North Korea has exploded a nuclear device, and even China, their only friend in the whole wide world, has condemned the action. It's acts like this that make me wonder what the hell dictators think they are doing. Has it made North Korea more powerful? I'd say that the chances of Kim staying in power have just plummeted.

The government has finally released cost figures for the proposed id card scheme. Apparently the first cards become active in 2008 and the cost for the first ten years will be, wait for it, £5.4 billion. That's £400 million more than the initial budget for the Iraq war, if memory serves me correctly. Of course, this is an obscene amount of money, especially when one considers that the current administration is taxing us to choking point, but the really horrifying thing is, everyone apart from the Labour party seems to think the cost is going to come out nearer to £20 billion.

As a country, we should be very scared because the government has painted iteself into a corner. It can't be seen to back out over id cards even though they know full well that they haven't got a hope in hell of delivering anything within budget. We know they are aware they will fail to make budget because they are already attempting to cut corners by using existing databases instead of building a new one. They haven't realised it yet, but they will soon find out that attempting to integrate incompatible databases is a bit like trying to stick your elbow up your own arse. In a way I'm pleased that the id card scheme is doomed to failure before it even starts. It just irritates me that it's going to cost me £ billions anyway.

David Cameron is 40 today apparently. That makes me feel inferior. He's just 9 months older than me and in line for the role of Prime Minister.

We have perfected a new feeding routine. The late feed has been cancelled. The 8pm feed has been moved forward to 9.30, and he gets solids at 6pm. It means we get a couple of hours to play inthe evening now. I should write a book about this stuff.

Veils and Bodily Fluids

It occurs to me that the Pope is not really in a position to make changes to Catholic doctrine because it has all been put in place by previous popes who were infallible. However, according to the BBC, "Catholic experts are expected to advise Pope Benedict XVI that the traditional state of limbo - somewhere between heaven and hell - should be abolished". The infallible pope has advisors? Do these advisors believe the pope is infallible?. I thought that Catholics have always believed that people who died unbaptised end up in limbo. It seems however that the Catholic Church has never been very clear on the matter. I was never baptised, so I guess I learn my fate when the pontif does his thing.

This whole story is interesting to me. Apparently Muslim teaching states that still-born children have a direct ticket to paradise. It has been suggested that this gives Islam a stronger marketing position and that the developing world is leaning towards Islam because it looks like a better deal. This raises two issues as far as I can see. First, it would seem to show that people choose a religion, not on the basis of what they believe to be true, but what they want to be true. And secondly, it looks as though Catholics may be willing to shape their doctrine to take advantage of this apparent phenomenon to i ncrease their numbers - Shocking!

Now, what is Jack Straw up to? He's not stupid. At least, I don't think he is. He was a Tony Toady and it had been suggested that he was very anti war, but kept it quiet so that he could keep his cabinet post and help show a united front. He has fallen out of favour with Tony however. He lost his key cabinet post at the last reshuffle, and is now leader of the commons. I have no idea what the leader of the commons does, probably nothing. He seems to be deliberately courting controversy however with his veil remarks. Is he trying to grab some limelight before a leadership contest is launched?

Specificaclly, Jack Straw has said that he thinks muslim women should remove their veils in the interest of community relations. He says he asks veiled women to remove their veils when they vist his surgery in his constituency. This has been, somewhat unfairly in my view, compared to the French stance which bans muslim girls from wearing a headscarf at school because it is not part of the uniform. I think the Straw stance is more coplex than the French. The French appear to be asking muslims to adapt to French culture so that French culture is not lost. Straw is suggesting that muslims remove the veil to aid cultural relations, because it makes non-muslims uncomfortable. I never thought I'd hear myself say it, but I have some sympathy for the Straw approach here. I've never had a conversation with a woman in a burka as far as I remember, but I think it might make me uncomfortable. Would you hire a woman for a job if she turned up for the interview in a veil? I think I'd feel very strange about hiring someone I couldn't see.

And finally, today's picture is brought to you courtesy of the dragon. Children, bodily fluids, I don't think I need to say any more...

Snot and Coughing

This week seems to have gone quite quickly. It's Friday tomorrow and I should start to think about what to do with the weekend. The little guy has still got lots of snot and he's coughing. He's causing his mother a lot of worry. It's clinic day tomorrow thougha nd he'll go see the health visitor if it's not tipping down with rain.

Today Tesco is in trouble because the consumer magazine Which? discovered that their new self service tills at the supermarkets around the country have a security flaw. The BBC claims that theives are able to steal cash from the tills, but reading the report this turns out to be completely wrong. The tills allow shoppers to scan their own goods and then pay by swiping their bank card through the machine. You can't pay with cash. Apparently however, you don't need to know the pin number for the card to use it, so cloned and stolen cards can be used.

I'd say that a bigger flaw was the fact that shoppers don't need to scan everything through the machine before swiping their card, which means they can of course scarper with free items. I personally never use the service at Tesco because it seems to take longer than the conventional tills as it is forever breaking down mid way through transactions. I say breaking down, I think it could be pilot error, but one frequently sees people looking embarrassed, waiting for techie help with a queue of people tapping their feet behind them.

Jack Straw appears to have put his size nines in it with some comment about muslim women and veils. He apparently thinks they should remove the veils in the interest of better relations. I'd say women should remove the veils if they want to. I have to say I hate seeing women in veils because it makes me think they are forced to do it. I do of course realise that this is not the case. It just seems as though no one would wear something that unflattering voluntarily. And they really are unflattering you know. But I am not a politician and I can say these things without caring.

I'm going to go to bed. I'll write more tomorrow.

Mark Thomas

Last night I went out with friend Big Pete to see Mark Thomas at the Arts Centre. I felt guilty leaving the dragon alone with the baby for the evening by the way. I owe her an evening out. I told her this last night, but she said she wouldn't want to go out without the baby and me anyway. This made me feel more guilty, but I digress. All you need to know is that I went to the theatre last night.

Mark Thomas is a socialist, comedian, and political activist. I don't agree with the greater part of his socialist ideals, but I have huge respect for the guy who is clearly very clever, and apparently hates Tony Blair, which is common ground between us. His current crusade is against arms dealers. He seems to have researched the subject very thoroughly. I can't check his work, but I have no reason to believe there is anyting wrong with his facts and figures. According to him, the British are the world's second biggest arms dealers. The US is the biggest. The UK arms idustry is subsidised to the tune of £850 million a year with public money. In case you didn't understand that, it means that £850 million pounds in tax payers' money gets given to the arms industry each year. The industry makes about £1.9 billion a year as far as I can tell. And that of course makes me wonder why the subsidy exists.

There was lots of other stuff to think about also. Mark is also currently on a mission to demonstrate how pointless the new legislation banning unlicenced demonstrations is. This legislation only came into existance because the government wanted to stop a guy from protesting about the Iraq war outside parliament. They drafted legislation saying that all protestors needed to be licenced. It didn't work however because they cocked it up. The legislation couldn't be applied to the guy in question because he began his demonstration before the legislation existed. Anyway, Mr Thomas now gathers as many people as he can each month to demonstrate individually about whatever the hell they want. That means that the police have to process a licence for each protestor every month. Quite a laugh really.

I'm going through a quiet period at work at the moment, so I've been taking advantage of the situation and getting myself familiar with Macromedia Authorware. It's quite fun and it is apparently the tool of choice for producing Computer Based Training materials. It has it's limitations, but it can be used to construct large and quite complex training presentations with interaction in a relatively short space of time. You can also publish as an executable file, or html. It's more versatile than ordinary on-line help type applications, and it's miles ahead of things like Powerpoint. I like it, and I'm getting quite good at it. I've been playing with scripting.

Isn't Lily Allen great?

Wrecked

Today there were police running around all over the station when I arrived. They had apprehended a young man who had apparently been trying to cross the tracks on foot. He was perhaps 19 years old and completely falling down drunk. I can only imagine that he had been drinking all night, since it was 8.15 am and frankly, the average person would have to drink for several hours to get that wrecked. He smelt of alcohol.

Yesterday, as I walked through the town center to reach the station, I encountered two teenaged girls smoking pot, in full view of the passing crowds. I have no strong feelings about pot smoking myself. I take the view that any idiot who wishes to do it is quite welcome. However, I don't want to see it, smell it, and I sure as hell don't want public money sunk into our health service to pay for it. More to the point, I would like to be able to walk my son across the local shopping center without him having to see it. In short, it's selfish and anti-social to make it public as far as I can see.

There are of course different views. Some say that drugs should be made legal. The libertarian in me understands this argument. People should have the right to send themselves to hell if they want. I still support that. I just don't want anything to do with it, and I should have that right also. The ususal argument for legalisation of drugs is weak I think. It's often said that legalisation of drugs would mean that the criminal underworld currently controlling distribution of such substances would vanish. I can't see it myself. If you go to the places where drugs are tolerated, it's still anti social. It's still the same low life pond slime selling the stuff on the streets. And ultimately it's still the same criminal organisations that control the supply. Making it legal won't change these things because respectable companies aren't going to get involved with anything so contraversial.

The irony in all this is that it was prohibition that caused the propblem in the first place. Had drugs never been made illegal, they would never have become anti social and all the negative elements to the business would never have existed.

North Korea are to test a nuclear device at some point in the future. Oh good!

There is lots in the news today about human trafficking. I hate that word "trafficking" it can't be a real word can it? They have to stick a 'k' in the middle just to make it read properly. Anyway, apparently there is a new centre set up in Britain to deal with women "trafficked" to Britain to work in the sex industry. I still have a problem with this. I realise that women have come from Eastern Europe and are working here in the sex industry. I find it very hard to believe that these women are being kept against their will and forced to work as prostitutes. How do you stop a woman from running away? I think these women have come to Briatin and found that the easiest way to make money (perhaps the only way to make money) is in the sex industry. Yes, they probably are miserable. Yes, they may have come here on the back of false promises. Neither of these things makes them sex slaves as the media is suggesting. Click.

Martian Cowboy

Didn't that weekend seem to fly by? I went to the steam museum in Swindon. I wasn't really expecting much, but it was really good. I have a confession to make however, we didn't pay to get in. We just walked straight in to the building, saw a notice saying "Museum Entrance", and went in. It wasn't until we emerged an hour or so later that we discovered the ticket office. I thought it was too good to be true. I thought about paying, but ultimately decided that we'd been lucky, and everyone is entitled to a little luck every so often, right?

I know it's only Monday, but I want to give the prize for this weeks most misleading news article to the BBC for this. The headline is "Many who pay for sex have partner". The opening sentence is, "Almost half of men who pay for sex have a partner, a study has concluded." The headline is misleading, the first sentence is just wrong. If you read the report it actually says that 10% of men interviewed at a sexual health clinic said that they had paid for sex. Of these, 25% were regular users of prostitutes, 43% (not half) said they had a partner, and 20% had some form of STD (not really surprising for an sexual health clinic). So, unless the report is even more misleading than it seems, it's quite possible that the men in this survey who confirmed that they had used prostitutes, may have done so only once, only done so many years ago, or only done so when single.

Actually the Times also covers this today and is equally misleading, perhaps more so. They open with "Almost half of men who pay for sex already have a partner". That statement is untrue unless the men who admitted paying for sex admitted doing so while committed to a partner. I've half a mind to track down the "Sexually Transmitted Infections" journal, where this report originally appeared, and get some more info. Who would read a journal called "Sexually Transmitted Infections". It's not something to leave on the coffee table is it.

According to the BBC, the ten most popular songs played at funerals now are:

1. Goodbye My Lover - James Blunt
2. Angels - Robbie Williams
3. I've Had the Time of My Life - Jennifer Warnes and Bill Medley
4. Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler
5. Pie Jesu - Requiem
6. Candle in the Wind - Elton John
7. With or Without You - U2
8. Tears in Heaven - Eric Clapton
9. Every Breath You Take - The Police
10. Unchained Melody - Righteous Brothers

The word "Tacky" springs to mind. I swear, if anyone plays any of those at my funeral, I'm going to come back and bloody haunt them. I think I want John Lee Hooker's I cover the waterfront. I like that version with Van Morrison. I also like Martian Cowboy, by Toyah Wilcox (I can't find an MP3 for that), which is probably an indication of just how old I am. But of course, the thing to have really is Verdi's Requiem Mass.

Thanks to the gentleman who wrote asking for advice about marrying Taiwanese people. I'll write to you, but I don't have time to do it tonight. I have loads of advice to give you. You came to the right place.

OK, the JLH MP3 is huge by the way, the Verdi one is pretty small. Apologies to whoever owns the royalties.