Black and White

There's no internet at work today. I hate when that happens. What is one supposed to do at lunchtime? We have lots of work. I could be doing that. The daily report thing appears to have resulted in a flurry of messages from upstairs saying I'm doign well. I should be pleased but I am now consumed with paranoia and fear I may not be filling my sheet in the same as everyone else.

I went home on the MRT with Joanne yesterday. I don't really know her very well but we talked quite a lot and I learnt stuff. It appears that she is leaving. Her contract expires in the summer and she doesn't intend to renew. She is takling about travelling. It also seems that Peggy, who has been threatening to leave as long as I can remember, has just signed another year. She should leave. We like Peggy, she could do much better somewhere else. All the ladies in the office are apparently jealous of May because she has big melons. I didn't know who May was until yesterday, but I confess, I had noticed her formidable melons.

I got a mail from my brother this morning. A rare occurance indeed. I'm going to publish an extract here. Original spelling and (lack of) punctuation preserved:

I'm sorry i have not made contact before but as usual I'm a lazy little sod and you know how it is there is always some thing more interesting to do. my birthday was a splendid afire that lasted from Friday alway threw to Monday I'm sure this must be some kind of record there were a few casualty's along the way but this is only to be expected.thank you both very much for th pressys the man with the flashing knob has gone down a storm with the Lady's of the forest if you can get any more IL take 100 and make us a fortune we had some excitement this weekend when minge the cat bought in a live rat and took it under the stairs we removed the cat and i was able to get a clean shot at the rat i killed with one shot from my trusty air rifle but there was claret up the wall. i removed the rat and my friend oli let go of minge who stole the now dead rat from me and took it under my bed after i separated the cat from the rat we went out for Sunday lunch. its always fun at [this house] hope to see you all soon lots of love...

You should know here that "minge" is a quaint slang term for female genitalia and the name of his cat, "knob" is slang for male genitalia, "claret" in this instance I think means blood, and if you're wondering what the man with the flashing "knob" was, it was a small plastic model of a man who's "knob" lights up when a cell phone is used nearby. I found it in one of the night markets here and knew he would appreciate it. God knows what happened with him, we can't possibly share any genes.

You know, I almost never remember my dreams, but last night, I dreamt about robots. There was a black one and a white one, they were bi-peds and they were fighting. I might have been the white one, or controlling the white one or something. I can't remember. Anyway, I felt an affinity for the white one, which is a bit stereo typical isn't it. I don't know who came out on top anyway. If the sequel comes out any time soon, I'll report back.