Two Hours

I got to work late today, about two hours late in fact, because my train broke down and I was stranded between Didcot and Swindon for two, yes two, hours. I'm going to apply for a ticket refund, but I'm fairly sure I'm not going to get it. I figure they also owe me £8 for the taxi from the station which I had to catch because I missed the last morning shuttle bus.

The Pope has slipped up in the bath and broken his wrist apparently. I don't tend to concern myself with matters of the Holy Father, but this event occupied my mind for more than a few moments. Do you think he swore? And if he did, what language did he use? German? Latin? Italian? I have visions of his naked arse hitting the tiles and him shouting, "Holy Shit", possibly in classical Latin.

Someone has died in our local hospital from swine flu and it also appears that one of the staff at the boy's nursery is sick with it. Great, I guess that means we're all going to get it.

It appears that a company on the same industrial park as my office, has been "testing" an airport scanner in the street. They deny that is the type that sees through clothes, and that it is recording anything, but who knows? It's not like they are releasing any data. It would appear that the device has now been removed after concerned passers-by raised the issue with park security. But the story made it to the BBC web site and one or two ladies in my office appear to be slightly concerned that they have walked past the device twice a day for the last two weeks without knowing what it was.

My bus stops right outside my office building, so I seldom venture round the park on foot. I do occasionally stroll over to the post office, sweetie shop, or cash point machine, but I haven't noticed a "suitcase sat on a tripod". Had I known it was there, I'd have been dancing past it at every opportunity showing off my body piercing.

I started writing the following earlier this week, but it never got posted:

All the papers this week seem to be reporting that Tony Blair is "in the frame" to be first EU president. To be fair to the media, it isn't without substance, this is all down to Baroness Kinnock spouting about how Blair would be the government's choice of candidate. I still don't understand why they have made such a big story out of it however. There is no legal framework in place that even defines the role of EU president. In fact, the Irish have yet to approve and ratify the Lisbon Treaty, and until they do, or until another treaty is ratified by every nation, the job is simply not going to exist. Blair is absolutely desperate to be EU president of course, and for reasons that absolutely mystify me, the media are still in love with the bastard.

THE MAN STARTED AN ILLEGAL WAR ON A BULLSHIT PREMISE!

I think Irish ratification is far from being a done deal. And I think most Europeans see Blair for the slimy shit he is. The French would never vote for him, and I doubt that the Germans would either. The British probably wouldn't even drag themselves to the polling booth, but if they did manage to put a cross next to a name, I don't think it would be Tony Blair's. Why then does the media, almost without exception, seem to think his arse-hole plays the theme from Superman every time he farts? It's astounding to me.

Surely it is only a matter of time before someone drags up some ghastly evidence that will drown Blair forever. I'd like to know why his expenses were conspicuous by their absence when everyone else's were published. First we heard that the paperwork was 'accidentally shredded', then that it wasn't. But we still never saw Blair's expenses. He seems to have escaped without them being published. What about that time he lied to parliament about his involvement with Peter Foster, the convicted fraud whom he hired to broker a deal on some property in Bristol? How come he didn't fry for that? Then there was the case of Dr. David Kelly who apparently committed suicide after he was publicly abused by Blair's government for daring to question the contents of the now completely discredited Iraq dossier. Surely that should have ended in a trial, but it didn't.

My own opinion; he's made a pact with the devil.