Uprising

There seems to be something of a Christian uprising over the Da Vinci Code film, which opens this week in Cannes. The Christians are not handling the situation at all well. They're all throwing their hands up and telling everyone not to watch it, which will of course add to the hype and send more people to the box office window. The Christian lobby should stop and think about what they are saying. The official Christian line is that the film, though having some basis in historical fact, is not entirely factual and should therefore be avoided. Is that a good reason to avoid a film? It didn't exactly send the crowds away from Titanic or Gladiator did it?

I don't usually like to take the Christian side, but I'm going to do them a favour here. First some advice, don't tell everyone to avoid the film, tell them to read the book, then they'll realise just how awful it is and not bother with the film. Second, publish a synopsis which outlines just how bad the plot is. This will have the same effect as reading the book, and will be especially effective at catching those who don't like to read. I'm so into this, I'm even going to give you a plot synopsis here:

Robert Langdon, academic, is called to the Louvre to help with the investigation of the suspicious death of the curator Jaques Sauniere. Langdon doesn't really understand why he is there until Sauniere's daughter shows up and fills him in about her grandfather and he twigs he's involved in a secret society. Langdon realises that he is in fact suspected of being involved in the death and escapes with grandaughter (Sophie Neveu). It turns out Sophie was brought up by her Grandfather after the death of her parents, brother, and Grandmother in a car crash when she was a baby. Sauniere has left a series of clues for his Grandaughter and Langdon to follow.

It transpires that Sauniere is keeper of the secret location of the remains of Mary Magdalane, (wife of Christ and the true chalice) and information about the child and resulting bloodline from their marriage. They spend two days chasing round France and then UK following Sauniere's clues to uncover the secret, which turns out to be an enigmatic message hidden in a vault.

When they get the enigmatic message, they charge up to the Roslin chapel in Scotland thinking that it is where the message points to. They are wrong but they discover Sophie's grandmother and brother are there and not really dead at all (sounds like Dallas now doesn't it). Sophie's Grandmother already knows about the secret message, where it was hidden, and what it means. She takes it and returns it to the new secret keeper. Which makes you wonder why Langdon and Sophie had to go to so much trouble unravelling the clues left by Sauniere who could have simply told his grandaughter to call his wife in Scotland.

And that's where it ends except that Langdon didn't find out where Mary Magdalane's remains were hidden. It comes to him in a flash of realisation however. She's under the glass pyramid in the Louvre. The inference is that the catholic church knows all this information about Mary Magdalane and has covered it up to prevent the church from changing shape.

So there you have it, an utterly pointless plot based on Langdon's quest to discover a secret through a series of clues left by Sauniere. It doesn't work because the secret was already known by Sauniere's wife and there was no point in the clues.

So, on to something else...

Last night we fed the baby at around 11pm, then went to bed. I got up at 2.30 to feed him again, and then the dragon got up at 5.30. It was a pretty good night. I realise that I am becomming a bore, but you will too when you become a parent. He gets his immunisations today. I'll bore you again tomorrow with news of that.

I have a half built Tesla coil in my loft. I hope I can find time this year to complete the project. I'm writing this here in an effort to kick myself into action. I also want to build a pepper's ghost illusion demonstration. I'm not going to explain these things. They are just reminders for me.

I hate slugs. They have eaten all my white radish plants and ruined one of my sunflowers. I also hate cats because they keep shitting in my garden. I've covered the vegetables with a net now and the strawberry plants too. The Chilli trees are now flowering and so are the tomatoes.